6 similarities between babies and superheroes

So obviously Baby has changed your life, but he and his onesie-wearing brethren also have a lot more in common with world-changing caped crusaders from the big screen than is obvious when you’re just getting to know him.

  1. They have superhuman strength
    Newborn babies have a surprisingly strong grip – their palmar grasp reflex lets them grasp things in front of them and hold on, and the grasp is strong enough to hold their own body weight for seconds at a time. That’s not bad for someone who’s had almost no time at all to develop his strength, and he only gets stronger from there.
  2. They can sleep with both eyes open (kind of)
    Baby knows that sleeping with only one eye open is no way to behave when you’re the long arm of justice in a city riddled by crime. Well that, or he is, in fact, an infant, and may spend more time in REM sleep than the average adult. This REM overload can result in some slightly unnerving, sleeping-with-his-eyes-open moments. Babies who sleep with their eyes open don’t have wide-eyed, alert looks, but they can be open in slits, with eye movements that can feel a little creepy when you’re not expecting them.
  3. They’re shape-changers
    Did you know that Baby was born without kneecaps? Even without them, however, he started out with several more bones than adult humans have. As he grows out of babyhood and into toddlerhood and then childhood, the cartilage in those kneecaps will harden into bone. In his first year, he also more than doubles in size, and his eyes and hair may change color.
  4. There are times when they’re radioactive
    Not actually radioactive – don’t worry. But while Baby may not have gone green or turned arachnid, his poop definitely does both turn green and occasionally deserves a “hazardous material” warning sign.
  5. They’re inhumanly stoic
    Baby may wail on a regular basis, but until he’s at least a couple of weeks old, you’re more likely to see tears from Wolverine than from your newborn – most newborns literally do not have the ability to cry tears yet.
  6. Their work is never done
    Sure, Baby is up at 3 a.m. because he is in need of a snack, not because he has a burning desire to save Gotham, but the result is the same – Baby is as much a creature of the night as the Dark Knight.
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